Tuesday, January 30, 2007

miscellaneous nonsense

Storker creates some interesting projects. All kinds of street installations. I love these carousel horses.


Here are some funnies for you, Erin:

The following quotations are taken from official court records across the nation, showing how funny and embarrassing it is that recorders operate at all times in courts of law, so that even the slightest inadvertence is preserved for posterity.

* Lawyer: "Was that the same nose you broke as a child?"
* Witness: "I only have one, you know."

* Lawyer: "Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?"
* Witness: "By death."
* Lawyer: "And by whose death was it terminated?"

* Accused, Defending His Own Case: "Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse?"

The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail.

* Lawyer: "What is your date of birth?"
* Witness: "July 15th."
* Lawyer: "What year?"
* Witness: "Every year."

* Lawyer: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?"
* Witness: "No."
* Lawyer: "Did you check for blood pressure?"
* Witness: "No."
* Lawyer: "Did you check for breathing?"
* Witness: "No."
* Lawyer: "So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?"
* Witness: "No."
* Lawyer: "How can you be so sure, Doctor?"
* Witness: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar."
* Lawyer: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"
* Witness: "Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere."

Here is the link for more Courtroom Quotes.

One night in a restaurant about 3 weeks ago, a man left his tip for the waitress looking like this. She was very pleased with it and brought it out to show several people. I didn't see it up close, so don't know what the bill was; it could have been a five...

Here is a link to creating your own shirt.

7 comments:

  1. Very cool way to leave a tip. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Eons ago in college I waited tables and occasionally I'd get a bill folded into a crane or bowtie or ring. Usually by some old codger who was alone.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I wanna try this...maybe in fabric...=-)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thanks for the jokes--those were all new to me, and the laugh is always appreciated.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I love the brainless lawyer joke! Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I have a friend who has a stack of fake $1 million bills that he gives with his tip if the service has been really, really good. Imagine thinking it was real. . .

    ReplyDelete
  7. Once upon a time (before children) I was a lawyer. There is a great deal of humour subsumed within the legal profession!

    ReplyDelete

Good to hear from you!